BTM Issue 05-2009

TOP STORY: The star of Dexter's Laboratory, DeeDee gives us a sneak preview of BLOAToons Cinema's latest romantic comedy, The Lunch Guru
After her show ended, DeeDee thought she would make a comeback of herself in an all new appearance
DEEDEE: It's my time to expand
ALSO THIS MONTH: Former Kids Next Door, Numbah 5 has crated a new brand of cheesy nachos and dip. She calls it, BIG CHEESE nacho snacks
NUMBAH 5: Numbah 5 makes sure that this snack is cheesier than the rest
And Wayside's Maurecia says she's having production on the way for the spin-off series, WEIGHTside
MAURECIA: It'll be bigger than the original show, I should know, I measured my gut this morning

The Following Article is about Numbah 5's Nacho Busines by , thanks, mate

She was a member of the most elite, secret group that anyone under the age of thirteen can belong to. Millions cheered her exploits every week as she fought against the tyranny of adults and their evil, child-hating ways. But then, her show was cancelled. And now you ask what does Abigail Lincoln, better known as Numbah Five, have to say about these changes in her life?

“Mmmm, Numbah Five loves nachos!”

Yes, as nonsensical as it sounds, nachos have now become the new focus of Numbah 5’s life, although many who knew her show no surprise.

“Numbah 5 always showed a love for nachos.” Says 5’s former leader, Numbah 1. “I mean, you saw when we went to the pool with Wink and Fib. I wanted to stop them, but noooo, she had to get her nachos! Who has that much dedication to food? Even nachos, come on!”

Regardless of her friend’s opinions, Numbah 5 continued her love of the cheesy snack food, and after Kids Next Doot went off the air, she decided it was time to put her love of nachos to good use.

“Numbah 5 thought, ‘I’ve already tasted the fourth flavor of ice cream, why not make something just as good with nachos?”” the former operative thought. “So I took some of the old equipment from KND headquarters, and got a little more help from Numbah 2.”

“Oh I was happy to do it.” Numbah 2 said. “After all, Numbah 5 didn’t really know how to improve on the nacho formula; she was really in a crunch for new stuff. Get it, crunch? ‘Cause nachos are…”

“Boy, get on with it!”

“Fine. Thought it was funny. Anyway, we got together in Abby’s basement, and starting working on the formula every night when her parents were asleep. And Abby insisted on trying every batch we made; I didn’t mind because it was her idea and she was the expert.”

“Oh, Numbah 5 loved that time.” Abby recalls with a smile. “Every night was just nachos and nachos and nachos. They were all good, but none of them were ever as good as I knew they could be.”

But eventually, the two former operatives finally cracked the nacho code, and created the greatest nacho cheese sauce known to man- Numbah Five’s BIG CHEESE Sauce. The two took the resulting nachos to the market, and within the course of two weeks, had amassed enough money for mass production of their nachos, making Numbah 5 and Numbah 2 a fortune overnight. However, it had not come with out a cost. All of the testing had wrecked havoc on Numbah 5’s…..

“Aw, don’t you print that!” Numbah 5 insists, from the office of her new factory. “I don’t have any problem with what the nachos did to me.”

An impressive attitude, given the fattening results. Due to the formula testing, Numbah 5 ballooned up to nearly six time her original weight. Her belly now pushes out of her clothes, and frankly, is now the base for her entire body. Five’s arms and legs, fattened as they are, barely function under her massive weight of nearly 400 pounds. Due to her massive weight, Numbah 2 oversees most of the factory, while 5 has continued her testing duties, making sure each new batch of nachos is up to her specifications.

“It’s all good.” Five insists though. “I needed to make the best nachos ever, and this was the only way. Besides, now I get to eat nachos all day and I’ve never felt better! It’s amazing to be all round and squishy. I really hope that the people that eat my nachos can learn that for themselves. They don’t have to, but it is truly awesome!”

When asked about rumours of the reformation of the KND, Numbah Five just pats her tremendous belly and says, “They need me, I’ll be right there to roll over the adults!”